Where Theres 4 Theres More

6 ish yrs ago I never thought I would be a happy single mother to four kids, I would have never thought I would have encompassed the self esteem that I did... I also never thought I would meet Todd fall in love and share a life, I would never have thought that 3.5 yrs later he would tell me he got a house in Lake Cowichan and was moving out in 3 days. I cant control him leaving, I cant control any of what he chooses to do. I however will keep going to marriage conselling, and change the name to personal counselling, I will keep going to school, keep loving my children, and try to recover the parts of my soul and wellbeing that have become lost.
On a side note I have learnded that people may think they know what has gone on behind my closed doors, however they do not . And I am ok with that, I know what has gone on, and I know what my truth is. I truly thought I was worthy of a happy marriage, i know my children are however that is apparently not in store for me, and soon I will be ok with that to.

Penelope and Count-Pumpcula

madame penelope and count-pumpcula have made their debut! mardi gras decorations you think... no no they are a pumpkin and a squash that shall be entered in the carve for a cause at the kids school

Count Pumpcula is a hansome devil submitted by Ty

Madame penelope is an outgoing peacock who is just bedazelled

Her feathers are fierce and if she deosnt win I shall be devastated... yes I am entering my creation as my daughters LOL I dont have much excitement so I have to create it where I can

Hopefully these two earn enough quarters to win big

Interpersonal Learning and Insight

Rylie- Precious and full of emotions

Ty- Intelligent and kind

Olivia- Sweet and soft

Oliver- Hilarious and strong willed

While in school there are multiple times a week we look inward, evaluate our beliefs, keep our behaviors and ethics in check and continually strive to seek insight and grow through our own interpersonal learning.. I am now doing that in my own life, what I learn might not please the masses, however I seek peace and safety for me and my children.

Sometimes the attributes and 'tendencies' we learn about ourselves are hard to learn...
Sometimes the truth about what is in front of us is even harder to see...
Sometimes the voices of others say things that we cannot control and in turn hard to hear...

I am nearly 30, learning what I actually like, actually think and actually feel. During Elder Zivics visit with me and my kids he said that Heavenly Father works in mysterious ways, I have seen this before in my life, events that seemed to only have a devastating result have turned into experiences that have shaped me. I am unknown of what is to come that is out of my control, but what is in my control will be happy calm and spent with my children and once they are asleep my textbooks... Only 8 more months till I am a Registered Psychiatric Nurse....woohooo

Answered Prayers

Claudio D. Zivic

The door bell rang 25 min ago and Elder Zivic was standing there, there are no words to describe the level of fullness I feel. I have been treading water in a snow suit in the Pacific ocean for over a year now and I dont know what is happening in my world. When they came in he said my Bishop and Stake President felt they needed to come and see me today with Elder Zivic and his sweet kind wife.

When he came in he said my chidren were special spirits from Heavenly Father and they are on this Earth for a important purpose, his wife held my hand while he told me Heavenly Father knew my pain and it would be eased. I cried like a baby and told him I didnt know what to do, he prayed with me and blessed my home, children and me....

I feel blessed, I needed him and his wife to walk through my door today, I needed his message and the kindness in his voice. I needed his hug and I needed for him to feel my pain, when he looked at me I knew he saw my trials, I knew he felt my tears and I knew without a shadow of a doubt he was a servant of my Heavenly Father. I didnt even say a word as to how I was doing or what was going on in my world, yet he knew, he knew when he looked at me and I knew he did as well.

I am not the type to bear my testimony publically, especially on my blog. However I know that Heavenly Father has chosen men, Elder Zivic and women, Sister Zivic to carry his torch. He saw my soul when he looked into my eyes and I felt my Heavenly Fathers love when he embraced me.

Thank you Heavenly Father for listening to my prayers

love chelsea

Giving Thanks

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving

We started off writing what we were thankful for and placed them in the thankful jar which we will revisit next year...

Name cards and love notes in sachets for my children

The kids and I had a great Thanksgiving:) I am so very greatful to have four wonderful children and the time to spend with them

Notice the laundry in the background :) Theres no way around decorating a table and having the living room clean :)

Certainty.....

Certainty is something I have thought is attainable, something I thought I coudl tangibly grasp, a tactile painting I could admire on my wall... There are some things that are certain... impromtoo drives in the summer to a cheese farm, getting lost and finding a museum that had a paelaeontology exhibit

I am certain Ty will excel at whatever he chooses, for certain I will help grow his passions however I can.

I am certain my four munchkins are the darndest hodgpodge of talents, emotions and personalities.

I am certain these two are cannable and scrumptious when eaten:)

Ty and his 'mini Ty' as the kids at school say are certainly cute students!

Rylie and Olivia are certainly living out their left handedness to their fullest as well as the right sides of their brains!

Random beaches with four kids and a picnic packed is certainly a great afternoon.

Leaving a spiritual message for the bald eagles to see is certainly keeping us in connection with our Aboriginal ancestors and fellow Canadians.

Crab shells that match Rylies bruise on her forehead is well certain!

Passing my nose and cheeks genetically to each of my kids certainly happened.

My path in life other than a mother and a nurse is uncertain, sometimes the light at the end of the trees is all there is to hold onto, and watching your children enjoy the beauties of life.

Fuzzy baby kitties certainly make me smile and happy.

Watching Rylie blossom is certainly my secret garden.

If life were as easy and clear and Ty's bow n arrow skills I may be even more certain.

I certainly love this picture and feel blessed to have received two for the price of one, I am only certain of a few things right now, so I will hold onto them and see where this great big sea takes me.

I shall leave you with part of the Psychiatric Nursing Pledge from 1957

I PROMISE to respect the personal rights and privileges of my patient, and to do all in my power to prevent or alleviate physical or psychological discomfort.

I WILL ALWAYS be kind, tolerant and just... I will endeavor to cultivate a keen sense of observation and an understanding attitude.

(To read about a truly amazing psychiatric nurse please read Mental Wards to Blackboards by Marie Legault, RPN RN BsN