Lots of Spills and Sunshine

Lots of Spills and Sunshine

Friday, December 19, 2014



I've never  been one to sugar coat cat crap.. I can take living room Instagram pics like everyone else but it's not real.. It's a figment of a moment I hope to display... what I strive for.. Because part of me thinks it matters.. But it doesn't...
What i actually have is a laundry room. Full of laundry and bedrooms full of beds that are slept in. 
A maple syrup dripping fridge with expired  lettuce and fresh beer that's real.
We pick up our new baby hazel tomorrow, I should probably pluck my eyebrows and God knows my legs need shaving... Nonetheless I'll pass out in gravol bliss arise to a gravol low and do it all again... Kids, dog, cats, nurse, kids, snack, Netflix, pass out... Bills you know the rest 

Friday, November 28, 2014


It has it's trials, it's triumphs and those days you're convinced not only the stars are stacked against you but so is the dishwasher... 

Ty's been followed for years by specialists about his height and it's been a struggle; he's been bullied, he's cried, I feel frustrated I can't make it better. 
Seeing the paediatric endocrinologist from children's hospital yesterday answered questions  and left more unanswered. 

Ty looked at her and said "please make me normal" ... As a mum it broke my heart.

The meds cost 20,000 a year and I'm so grateful I'm a nurse with benefits and a Canadian. What my plan won't cover the drug company will on a compassionate basis. 

He will need daily injections of hormones which I will administer till he's 19 and were awaiting lab and  genetic testing to see if he also has celiac disease, or any other thyroid or pituitary abnormalities. 

Rylie has two learning disabilities and anxiety and last year she went from not knowing her alphabet at 8 years of age and today she now knows her alphabet and 75 sight words!!! Her amazing progress gives me hope for Ty's journey. 
Nothing in life comes without struggle except eating chocolate that is easy and lovely :) 

Oliver and Olivia are growing tons! Olivia much quicker :) Oliver's awaiting his turn to loose teeth, Olivia's sketching all the time. They're a bundle if fun, double the trouble and double the joy. They're both happy to be out of kindergarten and into the big grade 1 :) 

Our family is awaiting the arrival of our sweet Hazel Butterscotch Noël on December 19th!! 

Loosing our dog Louis a year ago has been hard and not one day has gone by that Olivia hasn't shed a tear or needed a hug and asked to look at pics of him. 

Our lives are rich and full of laundry, endless never ending rarely folded who cares about sorting laundry... 

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Rational vs irrational

Conversing with those in ignorance is like talking to a styrofoam cup... all it's capable of holding is hot water. 

Yet part of me thinks "they'll get it" "they'll employ empathy" "they'll see judgment and scorn" have no place. 
I'm passionate about issues related to mental health and addictions and I have 0 tolerance for those who don't. 
I'm at a phase where I'm trying to be tolerant and walk away from situations, conversations and articles that are cruel. 
However it's hard, it's hard when what's being said is so negative and I have fact based knowledge.... to say nothing. 
I was reminded tonight that it's not possible to have a rational conversation with those coming from an irrational belief. 
At a base level life could appear to be simple when we have our basic needs met; food, housing,  love. Sadly we don't all have that... Add in illness both mental and physical, socio economic concerns, addictions, abuse... Needless to say it's not very simple. 

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

It's my birthday and my kids are camping

It's my birthday and my kids will be camping and I'm OK with it. It's the first time in 10 years I've had a birthday and not had ANY of my babies with me. 

I'm not sad I'm happy! I'm happy because my kids are with their auntie and uncle and cousins camping on Miracle Beach, I'm happy because I'll be at work earning money to pay for activities, housing, food, clothes, braces, glasses and opportunities. 

I'm OK being "alone" as society would like to peg it because I'm more than being a single mum, I'm more than being a nurse... I'm Chelsea! And spending an evening with me, moi, Chelsea is a good thing. 

Too often we have a role either chosen for us, fallen into or what we think we are and the notion of being "alone" or engaging in self care is somehow selfish. News flash it's healthy, it's healthy to love oneself enough to be with oneself without guilt and prejudice. 

Happy 32 to me:) 
Incase your lacking inspiration spring like a 6 year old boy and pinch your butt cheeks and jump !!! Worst case scenario is a little belly flop rash! 

Friday, July 25, 2014

Lots a bride never a bridesmaid!

I'm going to be a bridesmaid!!!! 

Milla is gorgeous, talented and an
amazing mum! 
She also is a part of my heart for being the one with me when Oliver and Olivia were born. She cut their cords, she held them and kissed them before me... 
I love you Milla and I'm so honoured to be with you on your special day! 
I can't think of a better human to break my bridesmaid virginity with!!! 

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Feeling salty

I've come to the realization that I don't do crowds nor do I socialize well in large groups. I'm 100% fine with both however  others are not! 

Take for example: four children on my own Canada day celebrations= head count every 30 seconds, water bottle dispersment every 3 minutes, crowd control, planning where to go next, ignoring the not so lovelies  out and about.... It's stressful 
I'm ok with stress,I'm ok with working hard, I'm not too ok with others scorn for how they perceive me to be... That is what I'm working on. 

Sunday, May 18, 2014


Moved into our homes days apart over 6 years ago and our kids have grown up together.., priceless ... I spent my childhood globe trotting and wouldn't change it for the world.. Mine have spent theirs stationary and I love it. 

The twins were mere babes in play pens just 5 months old. Now they're free range chickens riding bikes, building forts and casting spells in the back yard. I wouldn't change a thing. 
Our combined 7 kids come in and out of our homes all day sneaking freezies and colouring carpet with nail polish. 
Alex, Ty, Raquel, Rylie, Oliver, Vanessa and Olivia's are the best of friends! They've successfully gone through bottles, diapers, potty training, missing  cats, lost socks, swapped toys, sleepovers, and arguments. 
These two are so priceless! 

Beaches, snow forts,Halloween....

Hockey games, Christmas and chilling 

Monday, March 31, 2014

Different strokes, flames, love

We light up the fire and run from the flame..... 

Music is lovely it sings to my soul...
I often find mysef nostalgic and sentimental past 2200.... 
My Rylie's  reading and in her first hunter/jumper show...
My Ty's cementing friendships and playing street hockey and helping me with his lazier siblings....
My Olivia's seeing clearly and eating cucumbers in bed...
My Oliver's adorable and working hard on flossing....
 Ty, Oliver and Olivia begin studying Andy Warhol  and Beatrix potter on Wednesday so excited!!! 
Today is a day... 
Tomorrow is tomorrow the only difference is a nights sleep and and a calendar sleep and what I choose to make of it 

The kids are into different strokes on Netflix it's so cute i love it!!!! 

Thursday, March 6, 2014

March 6 2012-2014

2 years ago 4 hours after this picture was taken and just shy of 46 minutes from right now I received the darkest news I could have ever imagined delivered to me by my sweet Rylie just 6 years old at the time. What happened in the following few hours were 911 calls, calling my three parents and crying deeper than imaginable. 
What began in the wake of tragedy was our new beginning of course I wasn't able to see any light in that moment only dark. 
I questioned humanity, the law, god, the universe and myself. 
For the past few nights I've had horrible nightmares and couldn't figure out why. Today during my drive to work it clicked " today's March 6th!!" Today's the day my daughter finally was able to say what happened today's the day our lives changed. 
2 years ago I was working 2 jobs and in nursing school full time and raising 4 kids on my own. Choosing between milk and yogurt, chicken or rice. Borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and pretty convinced I wasn't going to make it. 
I did, I made it. My kids made it. We are stronger, happier, wiser and where we need to be. 
A lot has happened a lot of amazing things. Rylie whose trauma prevented her from learning at school... Today she brought home amazing work from school, she's reading she's smiling she's growing, she's riding horses and truly god bless that horse he has given her more confidence and unconditional love than imagined. Dreamer will always be in my heart for the work he does with rylie and the best part he's just being a horse and she's just in love with him but together animals and confidence can heal. 
Ty is happy and smart and intuitive, he loves taking the lead and feels a strong sense of protection for me. He is so kind and gifted and he makes me proud each day. He too has overcome horrible acts and he too is my hero. Since his birth he has been such a loveable little boy, so happy and content. He vacuums when he sees me frazzled, makes his bed and writes me notes. He too has a love for animals especially cats. 
Oliver.. Oh Oliver how I love him. He makes us laugh each day he's bright like Ty and bless his heart can't remember more than one task :) he loves cuddles sleeping in his undies and his froggie stuffies. He does dance moves that will fill u with laughter and he has located every fruit snack hiding place in the house.
Sweet Olivia Lou.. She misses Louis and cries for him weekly. She wants to be a nurse like me and loves makeup. She has a daydreaming heart and wants to know why maple syrup is maple, why eggs are eggs and if she can make crepes. She drinks liquids super slow and always has. She has a teeny bum and most pants need extra elastic, she loves to layer her clothing and pack three stuffies to school each days. She prefers miracle whip to mayo and she's a doll with many strong opinions :) 

This picture was taken 1 month post horror. I am exhausted at the point this pic was taken I averaged 4 hrs a night of sleep. I saved up to buy them Easter outfits and felt lost. 
I successfully graduated nursing school and had a full time job before I wrote my exams... The light was coming, I could see past despair and started looking forward to our future. 
We started doing our special trips and will always continue to do it. I love this pic what u don't see is the 5 hrs a week of trauma therapy, burnt out mother and no way of paying bills. It's amazing how a picture can touch our hearts and yet we know so little about what's really going on. 
Today is march 6 2014 it is no longer  2012 and we are stronger, happier and more in love with one another than ever before.